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About yesterday.

Parties or gathering can really depress me.
I don't see the sense in being at place for a very long time just chatting it up, because I am not the typical chatting mouth. I am terrible at parties; when I'm in a room with people, it feels like the walls are caving on me and I "suffocate", before I show a sign of depression or "angry" I just bolt; I don't say bye. Yesterday I tagged along with a brother of mine from church because he was invited to a "party", once I get to place that people have already showed, I hesitate to enter (even with people that I know) I ate and I'm done, nothing more to do, just wait until its over but with convivios like this one, they get long... I just don't get it why they last so long. We got there like 7ish, I didn't last long, but they did, maybe they came home around 10ish... so much time....

I guess I need to change,
but why can't I be myself?
Why can't  I keep to myself?

When I came walking home, I told myself; I should've just asked him to drop me at the house instead of taking me with him. 

I don't do well at parties with people that dislike me, 
I don't do well at parties with eyes following me.

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